Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Baby Steps Part Deux

Well, I leave again tomorrow...I am VERY excited about my new job, but am getting a bit worn out by the MASS of information that I am getting, and the traveling....sigh. I will be possibly meeting a blogging friend this week, so that is keeping me going. She is VERY busy right now, but the possibility of meeting her, and knowing that there is someone I "know" close by brings me great comfort.

Ok, down to business.

Therapist last night dicussed my previous post...YES...I print these out for her. We talked about the "little girl", how old she was at this point, how scared she was on my last trip, how I am FINALLY able to see the difference between her and me...the seperation will aid me in holding her hand while she grows up. At this rate when I am 60, she will be in her late 30's...

Another very valuable conversation that we had was in reference to, as she calls it, "my little brain". Now, I know that she does not say this because she thinks I am small minded, but because my brain very closely resembles a housefly...it darts around from place to place at incredible speed, and with great effort. Bear with me...this will all have a point...

She gave me an example of her husband...who is also an anxious person...they were digging holes in their yard to plant some trees. Therapist...in her logical way...used a shovel...common sense. Well, her hubby decided that it would be faster to use a post hole digger...also not a terribly bad idea. They both dug away. He encountered some "user errors", and had to rig the digger to work effectively, then he came upon a rock, so the post hole digger placed aside, he had to address the rock issue....and so on...he became VERY focused on the issue at hand...the ever changing issue....this is anxiety at it's finest...not really like ADD, but similar. In the time he was focused on his ONE hole, she had completed several...because she didn't allow the same speed bumps that he encountered to let her lose focus on the bigger picture.

To bring this all back together...anxious minds MUST learn to deal with things in baby steps...something I have tackled before in a previous blog. It seems as though the BIG picture is too overwhealming...so we procrastinate....until it becomes so MONUMENTOUS that we eventually give up....I have NO IDEA how I made it through college! To explain this furthur, she used the example of cleaning the bathroom. (I recall cleaning mine sometime in the last year...I am not a "dirty" person, so it is not THAT gross) When the situation presents itself as needing to be done, it becomes this HUGE task...an ALL DAY CHORE...it's just one bathroom...but it feels like I would be cleaning the bathrooms at Grand Central Station...with a child's toothbrush. So, baby steps are in order to complete the task. Small goals...Monday, clean the mirror. Tuesday, the counter....you get the idea. Organization is VERY closely related to this...

Big House, Small Fly....

So there you have it...baby steps and flies for the anxious mind.

The bathroom....will wait until next week. ;-)


At 12:53 PM, Anonymous janna said...

These are great thoughts!!! I like the baby steps.


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